40’s the New 30…The Big Lie!

This is the year.
The dreaded year…the year of the BIG 40.

That may sound a bit dramatic but it’s been an impeding event in my life that has slowly crept toward me continuously with no delay.  Every birthday for the last several years I have forgotten how old I am.  Strange story but true.

Each year I would say something like, “I’m gonna be 35 this year,” and my husband would correct me and say, “No, this year you are gonna be 34…”  and I would celebrate like I just turned 18.

The next time the same thing would happen, “I’m gonna be 36 this year…”
“No, your gonna be 35…”

And so on.. it literally has happened for the last decade and it’s been nice.
It’s the kind of dementia thinking that I have actually applauded.
For some reason I have convinced myself that I am older then I am, and when corrected its like having a birthday on top of a birthday…a cake on top of a cake..I get so excited and feel younger, livelier, and more energetic.

But this year is different.

This time there is no mistaking what year it is.  Since the beginning of 2015 I have been aware that there is no messing up the dates this time; I can’t miscalculate or forget what is about to happen.  Turning 40 is just months away and there is no denying it.

This means a lot of things for me.  It means I’ve been out of school for 22 years.  It means that I am almost the age my mother was when I got married, and my own son is the age I was when I met my husband.

The prime of life is passing, they say 40 is the new 30 but I’m just not buying it.

My legs are restless at night, my skin is stretchy, my back hurts, knees are swollen, stomach bloated…OK, I know it’s not all an age factor, as I love ice cream & pizza and I’m far from being an athlete.  But…things are definitely changing.  Elasticity & energy are things I strive for now, not just something that shows up in the morning.  Toning has became a chore verses a natural look.  I forget my wallet, keys, phone, & kids quite often.  I forget that I forget and feel really horrible about that.  Dark circles are evident even though my bedtime screams at me around 7:30pm.  40 years are just settling in and the evidence of it is everywhere.

I was with some people not long ago and they laughed at my dreaded thoughts.  They said that 40 is the prime time, its a new start, a fresh beginning to great things.

I rolled my eyes.
It’s easy for someone to say that’s not there yet, or someone who has passed this point.
Can someone my age relate to me??

Surely I can’t be the only one who feels a bit of desperation for youth.

After some time and as the days close in, I have realized that I was right…40 is not the new 30!
40 is just the new 40.

I don’t want to redo the 30’s, I gained a lot there, but I don’t want to live them again.  In my 30’s I gained spiritual growth from working through some hard challenges.  The Lord brought people in my life and back out again.  I picked up some wisdom from life experiences and time in His word.  I have regrets in the last ten years, as I would be foolish to say that I didn’t.  I also fell in love with my husband deeper in those years, and watched my kids grow…my daughter was born 10 years ago and we were able to have 3 more after her.  I would love to see it all over again but I really like where they are now.  I pray I’m more mature than I was back then and a better mother & wife.  My body may be a bit different and but I don’t miss the trials of those times and I’m glad to be facing forward.

I am not excited about being older but I am starting to embrace what’s ahead.  I’m hoping that I can be as dynamic as my adolescence years, daring as my teens, free as my 20’s, and steady as my 30’s…all wrapped up in one.  Instead of doom creeping closer, I’m sensing a big party.  40 candles, lots of little ones helping me blow them out, and my sweet husband cheering me on for the next decade of life with him.

I’m thankful for 40, and I’m gonna be OK with miscalculating into my 50’s.
I am just glad that Ive been given the time that I have had; many don’t get to enjoy aging and their lives are shortened by various things.  For whatever reason, I get to be here and I couldn’t be happier about that.

I think I’ll tip my wine and eat my cake with a forty’s grin of accomplishment, reminding myself how gracious the Lord has been to me & my family and how much He has taught us about life, love, and truth.  Happy Birthday to me….soon (and not a day earlier)    πŸ™‚

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Comments

  1. Anonymous says:

    Samantha says enjoy Every. Single. Year. that God Gives you! They are divine gifts… Jesus only got 33. Have a very Happy 40th when it gets here!

  2. Anonymous says:

    You're beautiful both inside and out. Beauty fades but smarts stay. And you still have both. You are not alone in this and there are many others that also dread the 40 mark or even the 30 mark and yes even the 20 mark. You are such a wonderful person and your family is such a blessing to one another. Embrace it.

  3. Great perspective! I've been thankful for all my decades, and, like you, I would not want to go back without all the lessons learned! Thanks for this wise post!

  4. Hi stopping by from life-giving link up! πŸ™‚
    Great post! Every season of life is a gem… a gift from God to us!
    You're going to love the 40's – they are great! I am turning 50 in a couple of weeks and I wouldn't go back!
    Embrace it all and enjoy the ride!
    Many blessings to you!! πŸ™‚

  5. Looking back, 40 was a great turning point in my life. May the Lord continue to bless you and pour out his favor on your 40th and beyond!
    Blessings,
    Mary
    (from Inspire Me Mondays)

  6. Happy Birthday! πŸ™‚ Many blessings to you this year! πŸ™‚

  7. from the perspective of someone who is a year from 70, i think 40 and in general, the 40's were great! that was when i had pretty well figured out what it meant to be an adult! i think it was my prime. i hadn't wallked much b/f then and i started…felt much better with walking! kids were growing up and out of the home. 40's really are pretty great:)

  8. I'm so glad I'm not the only one who kept celebrating being a year younger than I thought I was in my 30s! Now, I'm halfway to 98, and turning halfway to 100 doesn't bother me at all. I'm in better shape than I was in my early 30s, I'm less stressed, closer to God and growing in his wisdom daily. I know without a doubt that God will be with me each step of my way–however many years that might be :). Happy birthday to you, and enjoy your 40s!

  9. ;-}

    I'm smiling 'cause I'm staring 60 straight in the eye in a couple of months. Not at all sure how I feel about it. If it's any consolation to you, I LOVED my 40s, felt like I really came into my stride and had a good grasp of who God shaped me to be. Went back to school … and the rest is history.

    May you find it to be a season filled with the best kind of surprises and invitations!

    Enjoy it all, Amy!

  10. Hi Amy! I'm 51, and I'd have to say that I LOVED my 40's! They were my best decade yet because I sensed God working through my life with more power. I had a bit more wisdom, but also was still youngISH to have energy. Now I'm content at 50, but it's been a bigger adjustment… God gives us grace for all seasons, and He has a plan for each stage. I'm looking forward to the future. (Even though, like you, I'm not crazy about losing my youth…) Blessings to you. May your 40's surprise you! #RaRaLinkup

  11. Oh girl, wait 'til you are 57! Enjoy every minute of your 40's. The wisdom you gain every year thereafter is priceless!

  12. I Just passed 35, yet I feel much older at times. I had my kids young so we are in the teenage stages. I'm kinda liking it. I'm embracing a little more rest. A little more opportunity to do little things for myself, like exercise. I've made a decision not to get bummed about my age. I'm going to embrace it_just like you.

    I do have to say that I got tickled at a runners blog the other day. A forty something woman posted that the 40-50 year old racing category is the toughest. I totally believe her. I think we come to a place where we experience New energy along with the aches and pains!
    Happy Birthday to be!

  13. Amy, my struggle was with turning 39 because 40 was around the corner. But when the milestone hit, it wasn't as bad as I expected it to be. And with a couple years' perspective (I'm 42 now), there's a freedom in my 40's I am enjoying. Wishing you an early birthday, Amy! Thank you for sharing your heart at #IntentionalTuesday on Intentionally Pursuing. : )

  14. Congrats on turning 40, it is a great time in life and may you enjoy every minute of it πŸ™‚

  15. One lady commented that you are beautiful inside and out….I agree, my dear πŸ™‚ Next year I will be turning 30 and to be honest I was struggling with that….I don't know why I was because I have always loved birthdays πŸ™‚ Well, a dear friend mentioned to me a little while ago that birthdays are beautiful because we don't know how many we will have in the future…swe simple need to enjoy each one the Lord blesses us with. After losing my precious grandfather only a month ago those words really hit home.

    I hpoe you have a delightful birthday, dear Amy! Hugs and blessings! And thanks for sharing with Roses of Inspiration – I appreciate the time you take to link up.

  16. Happy birthday, Amy! Life really does speed up as we get older. I'm one who felt like my forties were a prime time. I hope yours will be too.

  17. I grinned through reading this…I bet you are going to be full of joy and fun in your 40s, probably impacting lives around you in new and profound ways. I am early-thirties and already find that I have to remind myself that I am RIGHT WHERE God wants me to be. I am not supposed to be 20-something or 40-something yet…I was designed intentionally to be 30-something right now. This was a great reminder to live each season with intention. Thank you!

  18. I still have a few years, but my friends in their late 40s say it's a great decade! Happy upcoming birthday!! πŸ™‚

  19. I'm not there yet, but I think I'll be ok with 40, I had no issues at all with 30! x

  20. At 40 I was still having babies, not feeling inside any older than when I was 20 (outside was different). I am now 47 and fast approaching 50 and my husband is 50 this year. We are now grandparents and this is such joy. I know how you feel especially about our bodies changing as we get older. May you be blessed this year as you turn 40, may the next 10 years go slowly for you too :-). Thank you for sharing at Good Morning Mondays. Blessings

  21. It is so funny how everyone tries to convince us that one age is the new 10 years younger. It doesn't help the feelings we have about getting older. It is kind of hard to accept your new age when people are going back 10 years. Like you said, you aren't interested in re-doing your 30's but 40 is scary. Enjoy your wine on your birthday! Thanks for joining the Link-It To Me Link Party this week, I hope you will party with us again next week!

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